WHAT TEENS AND CATS HAVE IN COMMON

 • Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by name.

 • No matter what you do for them, it is not enough. Indeed, all humane efforts are barely adequate to compensate for the privilege of waiting on them hand and foot.

 • You rarely see a cat walking outside of the house with an adult human being, and it can be safely said that no teenager in his or her right mind wants to be seen in public with his or her parents.

 • Even if you tell jokes as well as David Letterman, neither your cat nor you teen will ever crack a smile.

 • No cat or teenager shares you taste in music.

 • Cats and teenagers can lie on the living-room sofa for hours on end without moving, barely breathing.

 • Cats have nine lives. Teenagers carry on as if they did.

 • Cats and teenagers yawn in exactly the same manner, communicating that ultimate human ecstasy — a sense of complete and utter boredom.

 • Cats and teenagers do not improve anyone’s furniture.

 • Cats that are free to roam outside sometimes have been known to return in the middle of the night to deposit a dead animal in your bedroom. Teenagers are not above that sort of behavior.

Friday Funnies

Here’s a joke for you: A customer called the airline’s reservation office to pay for his ticket with a credit card. The reservation specialist asked him, “Would you please spell the name as it appears on the card, sir?” The customer carefully replied, “V-I-S-A.”

LOUDEST SNORER

A 60-year-old grandmother has been dubbed Britain’s loudest snorer for her 111.6-decibel nighttime breathing. Experts said 60-year-old Jenny Chapman, whose snoring was measured during a seminar last week at a hotel in Warwick, England, eclipses the sound of a washing machine by 33 decibels and is 61 decibels louder than the average snorer. She said she can now sympathize with her husband, who is always complaining about her snoring.

From Justin : I found out that a Pneumatic Drill (Or Jack Hammer) creates a sound equivalent to 111 decibels! This lady doesn’t saw logs, she breaks up concrete!

Welcome to the new Star 92.7 website!

Hi there,

It’s Justin Flores from the Star Morning Show. We hope you enjoy the new look to the website and it’s many features. You’ll notice that you can now see what song is currently playing at the top of the page. The tabs located at the top of the page will help you navigate the site as well.  In the left column of the page you will notice the latest blogs that have been posted. It is our goal to have some fun and inform you daily with tidbits of information. You have opportunities to give your input as well, If you become a registered user to the website then you can comment on any of the blogs. Please remember to be nice! We are here to have fun and share our lives with you. The latest local news headlines from MyMotherlode.com are to your right, followed by the latest in Entertainment and Music news. Take our non-scientific polls and much more. I do hope you find this site useful and bookmark it as a favorite and check back regularly, if not daily. Email me with any questions you may have at justin.flores@mlode.com

13 REASONS TO VISIT YOUR LOCAL HAUNTED HOUSE THIS HALLOWEEN SEASON

The Haunted House Association (hauntedhouseassociation.org), a collective of the most successful and renowned haunted houses and attractions in the country, has announced 13 reasons that haunted houses will scare even the bravest of family members this Halloween season.

  1. Screaming is good for you! — The surge of adrenaline in the terrifying but safe environment of a haunted house peps you up and really makes you feel alive.
  2. Horror movie madness — Modern haunted houses have special effects rivaling top Hollywood horror movies, only in this case, YOU are the star!
  3. Get transported into another world — Haunted houses are completely immersive worlds that let you journey through using all of your senses with each room hiding a new horror in the darkness just like your favorite survival horror video game.
  4. Create lasting memories — Visiting a haunted house with friends and family creates memories you will never forget. For years you will laugh at how loud Uncle Pete screamed when the chainsaw started!
  5. It’s affordable — Haunted houses are extremely cost effective entertainment choices compared to expensive theme parks and they are easily located all over the country.
  6. Help out the economy — Haunted houses contribute vastly to the economy, employing approximately 100,000 seasonal workers every October while pumping tons of money into the production of the event and boosting local businesses.
  7. Not just your neighborhood decorations — The level of detail and artistic skill in modern haunted houses is insane, with many serving as museums of horror.
  8. It’s safe — Haunted houses are very safe, requiring rigorous inspection by local authorities before they open and often staffed by off-duty policemen and firefighters to ensure that extra level of security.
  9. It’s fun for the whole family — Haunted houses are great places for kids and young adults alike. They are controlled, drug and alcohol free events that still have a massive cool factor.
  10. It’s philanthropic — Haunted houses help charities by collectively raising huge amounts of money and contributing free tickets to scores of worthy causes across the nation.
  11. Haunted houses help local businesses — Through sponsorships and local deals, haunted houses stimulate the economy for everyone and give a push to start off holiday shopping season.
  12. It sure beats costume parties — The details, costumes, music, actors and overall experience of haunted houses SCREAMS Halloween.
  13. Haunted houses just plain rock — Today’s modern haunted houses are technological marvels, featuring skilled actors in great costumes and intense makeup.

(Side Note from Justin: The HI-4H Haunted House behind J.S.West Lumber is AWESOME!)

HOW TO LIFT THE STRESS OUT OF YOUR MORNING

Another morning. Another day begins. You get up too early, stumble into the shower and in somewhat of a haze try to get things together and get work or school on time. But by applying a few simple tips you can make not only the morning but the whole day more relaxed and smooth.

Plan the night before
Choose the 2-3 most important tasks and put them on a to-do list. By choosing just the most important stuff instead of a dozen things you are less likely to start procrastinating or realize at the end of the day that you filled it with less important tasks.

Pack your bag the night before
This very simple habit can alleviate quite a bit of stress in the morning. If you pack your bag before you go to bed then you don’t have to run around in your house half panicked tomorrow while looking for your books or some important papers.

Make your lunch the night before
Pack the leftovers of your dinner in a container and put it in the fridge. Just don’t forget to put it in your bag in the morning. You may even want make an extra serving so you can quickly heat up dinner when you get home from work/school. Doing this the night before will save you a bit of time and possibly a bit of money.

Don’s forget to just relax
You can’t get much done if you never get any rest and revitalization. Well, you can for a while but soon you’ll start to feel run down, stressed out and fill up with all kinds of negative emotions pretty much all the time. So take some time to just relax. Meditate in one way or another. Take a warm bath. Take a walk in the woods. Listen to relaxing music. Have some fun with friends and/or family. Release pressure, stress and tension that can come from a hard day’s work so you don’t carry all of that into the following morning.

Get enough sleep
It’s tempting to stay up a bit longer and let the “morning-you” take care of the problems – I do for example become more likely to revert to old behavior patterns such as negativity and being easily stressed – that come from lack of sleep. But be good to yourself at least some days during the week. Go to bed a bit earlier and catch up on your sleep.

Use a morning routine
What you do early in the day often sets the context for your day. We have a tendency to want to be consistent with what we have done before. So if you have the time – or are willing to get up a few minutes earlier – then a nice morning routine can be a great way to start a day. I do for example get up and drink a glass of water, pull the blinds from my windows to let in the sun, eat breakfast and drink a cup of green tea, brush my teeth, make my bed and declutter for a few minutes. Read more about my morning routine and the routines of many of the readers right here.

Keep everything in its place
If everything has its own place then it is whole lot easier to keep your home reasonably ordered and decluttered from day to day. And to find the keys as you are heading out the door.

Joke Of The Day

Looking at the cover of a women’s magazine, a title caught a wife’s eye: “Men’s Secret Fear About Their Working Wives.” She decided to get a first hand account. “What’s your innermost fear about my working?” she asked her husband. He promptly replied, “That you’ll quit.”

Joke Of The Day

A man is sitting on the sofa watching TV when he hears his wife say from the kitchen: “What would you like for dinner, love? Chicken, beef or lamb?” The man replies, “Thank you, I’ll have chicken.” The wife blurts out, “Shut up. You’re having soup. I was talking to the dog.”