As mentioned on the Star Morning Show. You are going to be the hit of the Thanksgiving dinner with these little gems. You’ll have them begging for more, or find yourself eating alone next year.  Happy Thanksgiving – Justin Flores

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims!

Why did the turkey cross the road? It was the chicken’s day off.

If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for? Their age!

What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him.

Why can’t you take a turkey to church? Because they use such fowl language.

What are the feathers on a turkey’s wings called? Turkey feathers.

What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving? The turkey trot.

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building? Absolutely — a building can’t jump at all.

How can you make a turkey float? You need two scoops of ice cream, some root beer and a turkey.

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like? Plymouth Rock.

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? The outside.

What key has legs and can’t open doors? A turkey.

Why didn’t the turkey eat dessert? Because he was stuffed.

What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children? If your father could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy.

Friday Funnies

A man dining out calls his waiter over to the table. “I’ve noticed something odd,” he says. “My alphabet soup only has numbers in it.” “Oh, I’m sorry, sir,” replies the waiter. “We ran out of alphabet soup. That’s stewdoku.”

A Big Oops!

At a clothing store, a young sales clerk — her first day on the job — was determined to give customers her unvarnished opinion. One day, when a man emerged from a fitting room, the sales clerk took one look at him and shook her head. “No, no,” she said. “Those jeans look terrible on you. I’ll go get you another pair.” As she walked away she heard the customer mumble, “I was trying on the shirt.”

Friday Funnies

At a big corporation the IT department was doing a password audit — checking to be sure the passwords used by employees were strong. On one computer it was found that a blonde was using the following password: MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofy When asked why such a big password, she said that it had to be at least 8 characters long.